


Close Your Eyes

by Mireille



Category: The X-Files
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-03-09
Updated: 2003-03-09
Packaged: 2018-08-15 20:46:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8072179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mireille/pseuds/Mireille
Summary: This is the way it will end."Close your eyes," he'll say, in a hoarse whisper, and Mulder will, because while he won't actually trust Krycek, he'll think he knows what to expect.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Definitely an AU, branching off after some of the earlier Krycek episodes--somewhere before "Tunguska"/"Terma," definitely. (Dear Chris Carter: I'd adhere more strictly to canon if it didn't give me a migraine to try to figure out what you were doing.)

This is the way it will end.

"Close your eyes," he'll say, in a hoarse whisper, and Mulder will, because while he won't actually trust Krycek, he'll think he knows what to expect.

He won't.

*

He hadn't been lying when he told Mulder that he'd studied Mulder's career while he was at the Academy. At the time, of course, he hadn't known what his eventual assignment would be, only that he was to work hard and become a good little FBI agent, and everything else would be revealed to him later.

At the time, he'd assumed that they'd simply decided it would be a good idea to have an operative in place at the Bureau. Later, of course, he'd wondered if Mulder had been the target all along, and if he'd been selected specifically because they thought he stood the best chance of being able to get under Mulder's skin.

Even later than that, he'd wondered if they'd realized that Mulder would be able to get under his skin just as well.

But it was true, he'd read up on Fox Mulder, the FBI's Least Wanted, spending what could have been a brilliant career in a basement office investigating cases no one else believed had actually happened. He'd admired the man's dedication in the face of overwhelming skepticism, he'd respected his ability to think creatively--an ability theoretically prized at the Academy, but only, Krycek realized quickly, to a limited extent.

And, of course, he'd seen photos of the man, and it'd take more self-delusion than Krycek had ever been capable of (or, at least, a different kind) for him to say that he didn't also waste quite a bit of time thinking of things he'd like to do with Fox Mulder that didn't involve the X-Files.

So he'd been prepared, he thought. Prepared to admire him, prepared to respect him, prepared to want to fuck him through the nearest mattress.

What he hadn't been prepared for, though, was liking Mulder. Finding himself amused, beneath the wounded-puppy exterior, at Mulder's blatant attempts to leave him behind, to get him to give up on the investigation even when it was, technically, Krycek's case. Being jealous as hell at the easy camaraderie Mulder and Scully shared, even when they were no longer technically partners, and knowing that anything similar that he and Mulder built up would be a sham.

No matter. He had a job to do, and he was going to do it. Personal considerations were just that, personal, and he wasn't being paid to handle them.

*

"Close your eyes," he'll whisper, and Mulder will, and Krycek will give in to the impulse to kiss him: first, lightly, on his closed eyelids, and then on his mouth, sucking gently on that full lower lip.

When he pulls away, Mulder will ask him what he's up to, suspicion coloring his voice, and Krycek will make himself grin. "It's a surprise," he'll say, and it's true, it will be.

"You'll like it," he'll add, and that part will be a lie.

*

He doesn't plan for it to happen; he never plans for it to happen, and that needles at him; letting things catch you by surprise is the leading cause of death in his line of work.

Sometimes it doesn't happen. Sometimes Mulder just punches him, and that's at least something he's got a mental framework to deal with. The other, though, he's really got no way to process.

It's not as though he's never fucked anyone as part of an assignment. It's just the way it keeps happening that always throws Krycek. After the first time, it hasn't been calculated, hasn't been planned; it just happens.

Mulder hates him, and he's not exceptionally fond of Mulder after the number of horrifying things that have happened to him when he's around, and it still keeps happening.

He still keeps wanting Mulder, and Mulder still wants him, and it's just a little fucked-up that that's the most consistent thing in his life at this point.

Hell, it's the most consistent thing in his life so far, period.

That's why when the orders come, he considers refusing. Then he considers accepting them, and just... not carrying them out.

Then he realizes that he's not that naive, and that if it's not him, it'll be someone else.

For some reason, he thinks it'll be better if it's him.

*

"Close your eyes," he'll whisper again, and Mulder's eyelids will remain obediently closed.

It'll be quiet in the bedroom, and the sound of vertebrae snapping will be unnaturally loud, and Krycek will flinch--but there'll be no one to see him, and so it won't count.

After it's over, he'll get up and shower, and dress, and disappear into the night.

He'll tell himself that he never has to think of Mulder again.


End file.
